Mannersmith

Perfectly Polite While Working-out

This month's Mannersmith Monthly was written by our office fitness fanatic, Mannersmith Consultant, Marianne Cohen.

January is here and the start of the year comes those well intentioned New Years Resolutions. As a self-proclaimed gym rat, I find it fascinating to watch others at the gym, especially in January. Of particular note is how the "resolutioners" (those that join in January) interact with the old-timers like me. Below are tips and techniques to ensure that everyone is comfortable using their gym.

Whistling While Working Out ~ Although you may think you will make it to the final round of American Idol, others may not have the same feeling! Be aware that when you begin to sing or whistle that not everyone has the same taste in music. Plus, it is hard for us to join in when we can't hear what song you are listening to on your iPod.

Rules Are Not Meant To Be Broken ~ If you are not aware of the policies and procedures of a particular gym, make sure to ask an employee to show you the ropes. Look to see what others are doing, or set up a session with a trainer. Knowing the rules of the gym allows everyone's experience to be enjoyable.

Reservation for One ~ Gyms differ in their sign-in procedures for popular classes. If yours is one where you need to make a reservation for a class, please honor your reservation. If you cannot make the class, be sure to cancel ASAP so someone else can take advantage of the opening.

Privacy Please ~ Remember, that the locker room is the place to change, shower, and get on with your life. It is not the time to show off your "assets," conduct a telephone meeting, or reorganize your entire gym bag. While you may be comfortable walking around in your birthday suit, cornering your long-lost step aerobics instructor for a hug makes everyone uncomfortable.

Phone Booths Needed ~ Cell phones at the gym is of great debate. Talking on your phone while waiting for children to finish swimming or for a class to begin is acceptable provided you are off to the side with the sound minimized. Carrying on a full-blown conversation while on the elliptical is unacceptable. Either forfeit your machine and move to the side to keep talking or return the call when you have finished your work out. No one should be subjected to your one-sided conversation.

Water Cooler Gossip ~ Many people like to use the gym as a social support group and forge many new friendships. Be sure your chatting does not block the traffic flow on the gym floor or access to any of the equipment. Better yet, meet in the lobby for the life-update or swing by a local coffee shop.

Wipe Up to Wipe Out ~ With the flu season upon us the gym can become a germ-a-palooza! No one wants to walk in to a gym and be accosted by machines with germ-ridden, sweaty handles. The rule is simple, you use - you wipe; cardio machines, weights, and exercise mats. Most gyms supply antibacterial wipes and gels. Use them! Your personal towel does not protect others. You still need to use the provided wipes or spray provided to prevent the spread of infections.

Perfumania ~ While working out, there will be sweat. And where there is sweat, there is bound to be body odor. To minimize unpleasant odors, opt for deodorant. Perfume or cologne applied on top of body odor combines to a nocuous smell for others. Plus, you may trigger someone's allergies. Best to wait until after your workout and after you have showered to apply those new designer perfume, cologne and lotions.

Regulars Relax ~ Just because someone recently joined a gym does not mean they are there to ruin your work out. Remember, even if you were not a "resolutioner" when you first joined, at some point, you were new too. Be kind, be courteous, be helpful. The faster they feel comfortable, the faster they will become part of the flow. Remember the golden rule. It goes a long way to keep the spirit of holiday giving going.

Now is a great time to start an exercise routine. While Mannersmith always promotes good behaviors, remember manners matter, but safety first. Please check with your healthcare professional before starting any exercise routine. The holidays are over and January is a great time to hit the gym to get in shape... bathing suit season is only 6 months away!

Tips on Tipping

The end of the year is your chance to show your appreciation to those people who make your life easier. Please keep in mind that tips are very subjective. Tips are dependent on your relationship with the individual and the norms for your area, as well as your budget. Tips should be crisp, new bills placed in an envelope with a card or note of appreciation. When appropriate, small gifts can be given along with the tips. Below are some guidelines for holiday tipping:

Child Care ~

• Babysitter: Two nights' pay
• Nanny: One weeks' salary 1st year, more for each additional year
• Au Pair: One weeks' salary 1st year, more for each additional year

Apartment Living ~

• Custodian: $20 - $50
• Doorman: $25 - $200
• Handyman: $15 - $50
• Superintendent: $25 - $100
• Parking Attendant: $20 - $50

Home Care ~

• Cleaners: One weeks' salary
• Dog Walker: One days' pay
• Garbage Person: $20
• Regular Delivery Person: $5 - $20
• Lawn/Snow Crew: $10 per person, a bit more for the boss
• Newspaper Deliverer: $5 - $30

Personal Care ~

• Hairstylist: Cost of one session
• Shampoo Person: $5 - $20
• Manicurist: $15 - $30
• Masseuse: Cost of one session

For people who do not receive tips, a small gift accompanied by a note of appreciation is appropriate ~

• Mail Carrier
• Teachers
• Doctors
• Professionals, such as plumbers and electricians

If you have had an economically down year, if you have lost your job, or if money is truly tight, you will still need to be thoughtful. To skip the tip is to imply to your service providers that they are not valued or have done something wrong. Instead, write a heartfelt note thanking them. Include a small token of appreciation such as some homemade cookies, a coffee gift card, or small gift. When your finances are fluid again, please do tip them.

Happy Holidays from the Mannersmith Team!

Halloween etiquette

Trick-or-treat time is only three days away. While we get our little ones in their costumes and get them ready to head out the door, everything about Halloween flies in the face of what we tell our kids not to do. Mannersmith recently joined the FOX25 Morning News to talk about the best way to approach Halloween with the kids.

Halloween Mayhem to Holiday Manners for Minors

As the holiday season approaches, Mannersmith's Marianne Cohen shares suggestions to prepare your children for the festivities.

It is crazy how the calendar says October, and already the end-of-year holiday decorations are out. Children are getting excited about wearing their cool Halloween costumes while parents are fretting about planning the upcoming holiday meals and gatherings. One way to ensure the holidays are smooth sailing for all those involved is to provide your children with the proper tools for polite behavior. Here are some tips and techniques to transition your Halloween monsters into Holiday angels.

Review the Basics ~ Of course we recommend working with your children all year long, but now is a perfect time to review the five building blocks of proper manners: please, thank you, you're welcome, sorry, excuse me.

Do Your Homework ~ Ask each child to come up with one new thing about themselves to share with relatives and friends they have not seen in a long time. Those involved may be surprised to learn how much they have in common. For instance, if your daughter scored the winning goal in her soccer tournament, she may find that Great Aunt Sophie was also a star soccer player in her day.

Act Like a Journalist ~ It is never too early to teach youngsters how to handle an awkward pause in a conversation. Have the child pretend they are a journalist. They can ask a guest questions about their past or their interests, and may find something in common which can lead to an interesting conversation.

Practice, Practice, Practice ~ It takes approximately 28 repetitions to make a behavior a habit. If you would like your children to learn how to set the table, have them do it every day and soon it will become second nature. Every time they ask for something without saying "please," have them say the whole sentence again. Soon it will be routine.

Be a Model ~ As parents, we are the role models for our children. For example, if you want them to have good table manners, you need to have good table manners; if you want them to set the table correctly, you need to show them how to set the table. Practice a formal dinner at home and make it a game. Using role reversal, pretend to be their age and show them the bad manners they are exhibiting. Ask them what they saw and how it can be corrected.

Mail Call ~ Children should learn to write thank you notes as early as they can hold a crayon. There is never a bad time for a thank you note. Toddlers can draw a picture of the gift and once they can write their name, they can sign the cards. As they get older, you can make or purchase fill-in-the-blank cards and have them write the recipient's name and their name, and then keep expanding as they get older. By third grade, they should be able to write a simple thank you note. At Mannersmith, we like to say that an "emailed thank you means you cared enough to send the very least." Handwritten thank you cards are a cheap and effective way to make someone's day.

Oscar Award ~ Has your child ever opened a gift, and by the look on their face, thought it was the ugliest sweater they had every seen? Before the holiday season gets underway, review with your children that it is the thought that counts. The giver may not have thought enough about the recipient's interests and likes, but they did give the child a gift nonetheless. You can also teach your children the art of philanthropy. If they really do not want the sweater, you can donate the gift to someone who may need and enjoy it.

The holiday season can be very stressful for all those involved but by practicing polite behaviors, it may make it a little less hectic.

We wish you and your trick-or-treating monsters a very happy holiday season.

Epidemic Etiquette

From hardcopy headlines to top stories on internet news sites, we are inundated with swine flu warnings. H1N1 has infiltrated almost every aspect of our lives. Even with the vaccine hitting our healthcare providers' offices, the guidelines of who-should-be-vaccinated-when are shifting. With schools in session, offices staffed and upcoming meetings and conferences scheduled, polite people everywhere are wondering what they should be doing for meet and greet situations. How should you react when someone extends an arm and you would rather not touch them with a ten-foot pole? Yes, there is etiquette for epidemics. Here are some of the things you can do to protect yourself.

Just For You:

1. Wishy Washy ~ One of the best ways to prevent the spread of illness is to wash your hands with soap and water frequently.
2. Scan for Signs ~ As you are meeting with others, if their eyes are glassy, if they seem stuffy, if there is a cough, if they are running warm, then increase your body distance from them. Take care not to touch your eyes, nose or mouth after shaking hands. When your meeting has concluded, be sure to wash your hands.
3. Great Gels ~ Since a sink is not always nearby, carry a small anti-bacterial gel with you to wipe your hands.
4. Spic and Span ~ Take the time to clean your space, both at the office and at home. Be sure to wipe down the often forgotten items such as doorknobs, arms rests, light switches, keyboards, mice (the computer variety), telephones, cell phones, keys, steering wheels, refrigerator handles, cabinet and cupboard pulls, and faucets.
5. Be Aware of Your Body ~ Even if you have not knowingly been around the sick, listen to your body. If you are feeling run down, if you are sporting a fever, cough, or really runny nose, take the time to stay home and get better. You do not want to be known as the local Typhoid Mary.

Hosting or Managing Others:

1. Set a Standard ~ Whether it is regular office interactions or an annual gathering, communicate with those involved to set an introduction protocol. "In light of the highly contagious H1N1, we ask that meeting attendees greet each other with warms smiles and avoid hand-to-hand contact."
2. Provide Protection ~ Add to each reception area, conference room and lunchroom anti-bacterial gel dispensers to allow for frequent applications.
3. Encourage Cleanliness ~ Speak explicitly with the cleaning staff about wiping down frequently touched surfaces to avoid spreading germs.
4. Send or Stay Home ~ Communicate clearly with your staff or meeting participants that when they do not feel well, they should stay home. Set an example. If you are not well, stay home!
5. Be Ready - Backups ~ Have your contingency plans in place. Are your employees able to work from home? Do you have pre-assigned back-ups to take over critical functions? If not, now is the time to think things through and train those who will cover during an absence.

While certainly not ideal, in etiquette, we loath to leave someone with an extended arm hanging. The polite person will shake the extended hand and then remember to run to the restroom as soon as possible for a good hand washing. Should you decide to use gel, be sure not to do so in eyesight of the other person as you would not want to imply the hand you just shook was germ-ridden.